Self-Confliction
by pinoychick101
Summary: I feel the last of my spirit drain away. I'm about to let go. "You know how I feel about promises. So why the hell did you break ours?" (EXCERPT FROM STORY)


**Disclaimer: I don't own D. Gray-man or any of its characters.  
I only own my OC's.  
THIS FIC WAS A SPUR OF THE MOMENT THING.  
Read and Review!**

I notice concern plastered in his eyes.

Why?  
It clicks.  
He is scared.

Why?  
Of what?  
My steel eyed samurai doesn't get scared.

Why?  
I look behind me.  
I see a wall.  
Confusion becomes me.

I hear the voice sneer at me.  
_**He cannot help you.**_  
How come?  
_**Because I said so!**_  
I cringe.

I hear the voice sneer at me.  
_**What a pathetic human.**_  
You say that as if you aren't human.  
_**It's because I'm not.**_  
I gasp in fear.

I hear the voice sneer at me.  
_**See?**_**  
**_**Where is your rescuer?**_  
He will come!  
_**Will he?  
You cannot escape this place.**_

You are trapped.  
I look around.  
I am surrounded by darkness.  
Darkness that restricts my movement.  
My arms swipe at empty space.

You are trapped.  
My legs are frozen in place.  
I shout out.  
Where are you?  
Where am I?

You are trapped.  
The space in front of me glimmers.  
A person appears in front of me.  
I scream.  
I see myself smirking.

What is this?  
I raise my hand to hit my doppelganger.  
I catch my hand.  
I struggle.  
_**It's pointless**_

What is this?  
There cannot be two of me.  
I am not a twin.  
_**I'm not your twin to begin with.**_

What is this?  
Explain yourself!  
I demand.  
I smirk and reply  
_**What is there to explain.**_

I am you.  
Lies.  
_**Is it?**_  
It is.  
_**Positive?**_

I am you.  
_**Get it through your thick head.**_  
Never.  
_**We are so stubborn.**_  
We are not the same thing.

Are you sure?  
_**I know your darkest moments.  
Moments no one knows.**_  
I swallow nervously.  
I laugh.

Are you sure?  
_**I am you.  
I am the darkness you harbor in you.  
I have waited for the perfect moment.**_

Are you sure?  
_**Can you be positive we are different?**_  
Of course we are!  
I have no darkness!  
You are the one who lies!

Pain blossoms.  
Stop!  
Stop it!  
_**Why?  
This is fun.**_

Pain blossoms.  
I scream in agony.  
I grin and laugh.  
_**Admit it.  
You are enjoying this.**_

Pain blossoms.  
This is pain!  
What is there to enjoy?  
_**The masochist in you is laughing.  
I am that masochist.**_

What am I?  
_**Now you begin to doubt yourself?  
It sure took you a damn long time to do it.**__  
_I am human.  
I am normal.

What am I?  
What if I'm a monster?  
An Akuma?  
Am I under some mind control from the Earl  
_**Are you?**_

Fear.  
I put all I care about at risk.  
My brother.  
My friends.  
My blue haired samurai.

Fear.  
_**Are you not enjoying it?  
The darkness closing in around you?**_**  
**I feel arms wrap around me.  
I begin struggling but I cannot move.

Fear.  
True fear.  
I feel it.  
Death's grip pulling me down into hell.

"Come back!"  
A voice so familiar.  
What a comforting voice.  
_**Surrender to the darkness.  
Soon your body is mine.**_

"Come back to me!"  
To where is it I'm going?  
I have given up.  
I have no energy left to fight.  
I laugh evilly.  
_**Freedom is soon to be mine.**_

"Damn it. Come back to me Alia!"**  
**Wet things fall on my face.  
I look up and don't see the source of it.  
_**He is interfering with my plan.  
He must die.**_

"Don't you dare die on me. Don't go back on our promise."  
Promise?  
I know this voice.  
_**No! Damn him.  
I will just take your body now!**_

Suffocation.  
I claw at my throat.  
Hands try to stop me.  
I force myself to move away.  
It then begins.

Suffocation.  
The burning feeling in my lungs intensifies.  
I open my mouth for air.  
Nothing.  
No oxygen.

Suffocation.  
I take a deep breath.  
Nothing.  
No air.  
Desperation over comes me.

I am dying.  
My lungs are going to pop.  
My vision is getting smaller.  
The darkness is becoming blurry.

I am dying.  
If I had air,  
I would sigh.  
Death is not what I had expected.

I am dying.  
My eyes slide shut.  
_**Finally!  
I am free of you.**_

I fall.  
Deep into darkness.  
I hear cackling.  
_**Free!  
Free to do what I want!**_

I fall.  
I feel so heavy.  
_**You will experience my suffering.  
Never will you escape me.  
You are too weak hearted.**_

I fall.  
_**Only the strong survive.**_  
The voice becomes faint.  
It's almost nonexistent now.  
I can't help it.

I smile.  
I flip through what little memories I have left.  
A green haired girl with pigtails laughing.  
A boy with white hair and a huge appetite.  
A red haired one eyed man with a big grin.

I smile.  
I see a man with pink hair sporting a large frying pan.  
I see a large robot reaping havoc.  
I see many white coated men working hard.  
I see a tall man with a cape losing at poker.

I smile.  
I see an old man painting the ocean.  
I see a panda looking man drinking tea.  
I see a man with dark hair and kind eyes tucking me to bed.  
Then a man with a temper eating noodles.

Goodbye.  
I'll miss tea.  
I'll miss joking around.  
I'll miss destroying akuma.  
I'll miss searching for innocence.

Goodbye.  
I'll miss the frigid winds.  
I'll miss the long train rides.  
I'll miss reading.  
I'll miss training.

Goodbye.  
I'll miss Komuii and his robots.  
I'll miss the crazy scientists who never get breaks.  
I'll miss Allen, Lavi, Lenalee and the other exorcist.  
I'll miss my brother Lucian and my special Samurai.

I feel the last of my spirit drain away.

I'm about to let go.

"You know how I feel about people breaking their promises. So why the hell did you break ours?"

**Yay!  
You reviewers let me know if you want more.  
And this will, hopefully, not interfere with my other fics out that I've been neglecting.  
Thanks for reading!**

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